The Place: After a false start at Cenote (which we discovered had been taken over by Spotify for SXSW) we moved on to Progress Coffee, just a few blocks away; a first visit for both of us. Great spot, by the way. I’ll be back, no doubt. Be warned though, parking is brutal. Tons of construction going on in the area.

The Cup: A cup of regular old joe for moi and Bridget opted for a glass bottle of Coke. The real stuff.

The background: Bridget is the second person I’ve asked from my 2013 wish list to be a part of the project. So far, I’m two for two and feeling a little invincible. Watch out Bill Gates, I hear you’re in town!

Sometimes I get nervous before an interview. OK, always – but the degree varies. This is the first interview where I walked out the door and felt jitters. As I’ve said before, in keeping with the spirit of the “stranger” part of the project, I usually know as little as possible about someone before meeting them. Read everything about someone and it tends to color your conversation from the start. If you recall my cup with Clint Greenleaf, I’ve already admitted I have a problem with making assumptions about people. The more I know, the more I assume.

When it comes to the Wish List, obviously people land there for a reason. In Bridget’s case, I learned of her from my pal Lance who heard her speak and was impressed by her moxie. He told me she was this brilliant businesswoman who was, by all measures,”killing it” in a largely male dominated industry. He admired her and knew I would as well. Once Lance uttered her name, I heard it everywhere. I tried not to read much, but unfortunately I’d seen enough to feel intimidated.

My fears were unnecessary and jitters melted away when Bridget sashayed over to me and looked into my face with the kindest, calmest eyes you can imagine. Yes, I used the word “sashayed”. Really, glide might be better. I don’t know if it comes from years of Pilates or what, but the woman is grace embodied. Whatever it was, it immediately put me at ease. Before we launch into the nitty gritty, let’s cover some:

Common Grounds

1. What was the last awesome meal you ate? Lasagna, wine, oysters and four desserts from Vespaio (a restaurant Bridget loves so much that she recruited the general manager to her latest venture, Mettle)
2. What is the best part about your job? The freedom to do almost exactly what I want to do. The”almost” part is in reference things out of her control such as rules the city sets and taxes. 
3. What was your best vacation? A trip last year to Italy.
4. What was the best gift you ever received? My son.
5. What is your best feature? My sense of humor.
   
6. What is your favorite way to unwind? Wine and food if I’m misbehaving. Reading if I’m being good.
7. If you could swap lives with someone for a day, who would you choose? Jazz singer, Nina Simone.
8. What is the best compliment you ever received? That I’m doing a good job with my son.
9. Who is the most influential person in your life? Me.

Bridget is a complex creature and impossible to sum up in a tidy sentence. She is fierce, bold; a trailblazer and also calm, reflective and empathetic. She is daring and courageous and she’s overly prone to niceness. I decided to look up the meaning of her name and this is what I found: power, strength, vigor and virtue. Yep, that’s her.

Born and raised in an middle upper-class family in Houston, it could be assumed (and it’s been reported) that Bridget had a idyllic childhood full of opportunity. Some have gone so far as to categorize her as a “trust-fund kid”. Nothing could be further from the truth. While its true that a lack of money can certainly make life challenging, an abundance of it does not guarantee ease or happiness. In fact, all the money in the world can’t make up for an unhealthy environment, absence of love, trust and security. We know from Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, that after physiological needs like eating, breathing and rest, we need to feel safe – emotionally and physically and above that comes the need to feel like we belong, we matter and we are loved. Withholding these basic needs is pretty much a recipe for dysfunction.

This part of Bridget’s story, while key to the whole picture, is not my story to tell. Fortunately for those, like me, who are interested in hearing it from Bridget herself, she’s working on writing a memoir and she assures me it’s filled with “crazy shit.”  What I can tell you is that she likens her story to that of Augusten Burroughs, perhaps most famous for his disturbing, yet hilarious memoir, Running With Scissors. Also, The Glass Castle by Jeanette Walls, whose memoir left me in shock, page after page. In shock for how anyone could live like she and her siblings did, and in shock over how they survived. Of her own upbringing, Bridget describes it like this: “Chaotic, miserable and shitty. And it made me a survivor.”

So how does someone who clearly didn’t grow up with a rock-solid support system and the tools for creating a healthy sense of self end up the Queen of Rainey Street? We’ll soon find out.

Bridget’s childhood finally concluded at age 34, when her years of irresponsibility, wildness, globe-trotting and partying came to a screeching halt with a two-word sentence. “You’re pregnant.”

Her new reality caused her to take a good hard look at herself and examine her options. She knew she didn’t want to give her kid a life of unhappiness and squalor. Bridget said, “You pull your head out of your ass and you figure it out. I knew better. And I knew I could do better. So I focused, worked really hard, stopped all my other antics and in the end, we rose above it.”

Bridget told me that bars and restaurants were familiar terrain and she knew she could make something successful in that arena. She says, “I worked my ass off, pulled my shit together and wrote a business plan.” In the meantime she worked three jobs, putting in 16+ hours a day. She hired a Guatemalan woman to take care of her new son, Ash, while she paid her dues. That woman not only took care of her son, but she took care of Bridget too. “I’d come home at 4 am and she’d feed me and tuck me into bed.”

The ass-busting paid off and Bridget opened her first bar, Pearl Bar, in Houston on the now bustling Washington Avenue. Fast forward a bit and Bridget sells Pearl and with the money, she buys a ticket to freedom. No, really. Austin is the city she longed, for years, to be in. I can relate. For one reason or another, it never panned out. Until 2009 that is, when armed with the dough from selling off Miss Pearl, she leased the house on Rainey Street that she would soon transform into Lustre Pearl, a one of a kind bar. She also bought a home and soon, leased another Rainey Street house that she’d transform into Clive Bar, Lustre Pearl’s testosterone-injected, cowboy hat wearing, suitor.

Bridget’s bars, while all unique with their own personalities, share a similar vibe; a deliberate vibe that Bridget describes as “cozy, relaxing and not pretentious.” Of Lustre Pearl, Bridget’s self-professed alter ego, she says, “she’s a party girl, come as you are, no bullshit. The only rule – behave well.” Judging by how packed her bars are, any night of the week, it’s obvious the woman knows what she’s doing.

Her success was that much sweeter, because as Bridget tells it, “There were so many people doubting me.”  Her family largely disowned her with the birth of her son, who is black.  Bridget “fired” most of them, adding, “I have a problem if you like me at this place, but don’t like me at that place. I don’t need it. Just go away.”

Beyond freedom money, Pearl also is responsible for introducing Bridget and her now-husband. He came into the bar, and after hanging around a bit, asked her if he could get a job. Considering he’d just paid her with his Platinum American Express, she knew he was screwing around. So she asked him what experience he had and soon the jig was up. It didn’t keep him away though, and they became friends. Chris was interested in Bridget but she was reluctant to give it a shot. Then one day he came to Austin and helped her with Ash’s birthday party and something changed. “I never ask anyone for anything. I guess I’m a martyr or something. I just don’t want to ask, so I do it all alone.” That is until Chris came along. “For some reason, I never minded getting help from him.”

They married in November of last year and around that time she made him the CFO of her company. Yes, there are frustrations about working with your spouse, but for the most part, it’s been a huge relief. She’s sleeping better, even though he’s not. The biggest change is that the free time has allowed her to focus on what’s next.

So what is next? Mettle, an East Austin Bistro, is slated to open in April. Mettle is a little different than Bridget’s other ventures. It’s 4000 sq. ft for starters, versus the typical 900 sq. ft. she’s used to creating. Also, it’s a restaurant with a bar, versus a bar with food. Finally, she’s lending her magical powers to another Austin neighborhood that she clearly believes in with a move from Rainey Street to the East side.

I am curious about the name and she tells me that mettle means strength and fortitude, adding, “it takes some mettle to get where I am.” Without question.

Container Bar is on it’s way to Rainey Street and will round out Bridget’s adventures in the neighborhood she transformed. We may also see a boutique hotel in the not so distant future, as Bridget continues to take over the city she adores. Of her empire she says, “It’s about good food, consistent product and excellent service.” Whenever she sees an opportunity to provide that, she sees her next venture. Bridget loves that Austin is an amazing city filled with great stuff, but she’s disappointed in the lack of consistent product and service she experiences. “My friends make fun of me when I stay at the Four Seasons, like I’m an old lady. But Four Seasons knows how to love on somebody.” She feels there’s way too much attitude in this town and not nearly enough gratitude, graciousness and service. Rule #1 in business: find a need and fill it.

What are some other rules I picked up in talking with Bridget? Well, I jotted them down as you can see in the picture to the right.

Once the restaurant opens, there will be over 70 people employed by Bridget; a responsibility she takes very seriously.  She only hires people who are going to take their responsibilities very seriously as well. Almost everyone she works with has been with her since the beginning. “The way you treat people – it comes back to you,” she explains. She tells me she makes sure her team knows there is room to grow, if they want to, within a company they like.

When I ask her what she does everyday that contributes to her overall success, she tells me she is grateful. “If you stop being grateful, all those gifts might stop coming. I can remember, when we had nothing, coming to Austin with Ash for a visit and buying a $3 bottle of Yellowtail wine, and I was grateful. Or going to Target to buy the pair of jeans that I’d wear all winter, and being grateful. It’s all about perspective.”

What’s the biggest issue facing society today? According to Bridget, it’s a lack of empathy and connectedness. “When I see someone doing a dirty job, I think to myself, that’s someone’s mother,” Bridget says, adding that people are too quick to dismiss each other with a “screw ’em” attitude.

Bridget tells me that she always knew she was going to do something big. So it’s not a surprise when she shares the 30 second message she’d deliver to the world if given the chance. “Enjoy your youth, take care of yourself and fucking live! Live large. Get your dreams lined up and do them. Now! Just do it.”

After an hour and a half listening to Bridget’s wild, unpredictable, eventual success story unfold, her final statement leaves me absolutely certain that she’s right. It doesn’t matter how your life started out, what paths you took, or whether your family supports you. Bridget is living proof that when you believe in yourself, anything is possible. And when you work your ass off, take care of people, are grateful for every gift, and never give up, success will be yours. That kind of success can’t be bought with any amount of money. It’s earned the hard way and no matter what, can’t ever be taken away.

If you’d like to learn more about Bridget and can’t wait for the memoir, have a look here.